5 pregnancy and breastfeeding-safe moisturisers for youth
Skincare isn’t just about having a daily routine. It’s vital for healthy and radiant skin, especially during hormonal fluctuations that occur during pregnancy and breastfeeding. Pregnancy skincare products used to be relegated to a tiny corner of the beauty aisle. Now, a wide range of products are available in almost any store, and the challenge has become deciding which one to use and which is safe for you and your baby.
However, when you have the right products to meet your skin’s specific needs, you can achieve long-term results, which include smoother, clearer, and more hydrated skin. This article will highlight some of the best skincare creams and moisturisers to consider, based on their distinctive advantages and how they can benefit your skin during pregnancy and postpartum.
Key highlights
Our top 5 skincare picks deliver hydration, anti-ageing, and skin barrier support – all safe for pregnancy and breastfeeding
Prioritise products with proven, nursing-safe actives like retinol alternatives, vitamin C, hyaluronic acid, or ceramides
Look for gentle formulations—fragrance-free, minimal irritants, suitable for daily use and sensitive pregnancy skin
Use them in proper sequence (cleanser → serum → moisturiser → SPF) for maximum benefit.
Patch test new products, and choose according to your skin type (dry, oily, sensitive, etc.)
Why choosing the right skincare matters (especially during pregnancy & breastfeeding)
Youthful skin is a matter of selecting the right products to suit your skin type and address specific skin concerns. You can combat the issues of dryness, pigmentation, and sensitive skin with the right product selection. According to the research from Dermspotlight, “Application of the incorrect product may cause irritation, breakouts or aggravation of the already existing concerns.” Being aware of what is good for your skin will save time, money and frustration in the long run.
Zoe Diana Draelos, MD, Board-certified dermatologist, research and clinical professor, says, “Choose products that match your skin type and its specific concerns like dryness, pigmentation, sensitivity because the right formulation protects the skin barrier and speeds improvement, while the wrong product can cause irritation, breakouts or worsen pigmentation.”
We will explore the best skin care products that address various skin issues, including pore refining, hydration, soothing, and dark spot treatment. We will also take a closer look at some products worth adding to your routine.
Ingredients to avoid during pregnancy and breastfeeding
Before we explore the products, here’s what to avoid in your safe skincare routine for breastfeeding moms:
It is crucial to determine your skin type before selecting products. Is your skin dry, oily, combination or sensitive? Knowing your skin type will enable you to choose the appropriate products that won’t clog or even worsen your skin. For example, if you have oily skin, look for products that are oil-free and mattifying. In the case of dry skin, the hydration and moisture-locking ingredients will be additional.
For new and expecting mums: Your skin type may have changed during pregnancy due to hormonal fluctuations. What worked before may need adjusting now.
Key steps in a proper skincare routine
A basic skincare routine involves five key steps that work together to maintain healthy skin:
Cleanse: Start with a gentle cleanser to remove dirt, oil, and impurities.
Tone: Toners balance your skin’s pH and prepare it for the next steps.
Hydrate: Use a moisturiser to replenish moisture and keep your skin soft.
Protect: Finish with sunscreen to shield your skin from harmful UV rays. For nursing moms, use mineral sunscreen (zinc oxide) instead of chemical formulas.
These steps can be adapted to suit your skin’s specific needs, but this structure provides a solid foundation for any skincare routine.
Best skincare products to try (safe for pregnancy and breastfeeding)
Here are the best skincare creams and moisturisers according to Health Insiders that you can try:
1. WOWMD Witch Hazel Pore Perfecting Toner – best for pore refining and balancing
Pregnancy and breastfeeding safe
Toning is a crucial step, particularly for those with large pores or oily skin. The WOWMD Witch Hazel Pore Perfecting Toner is used to refine pores and balance skin by eliminating excess oil without over-drying. Hyaluronic acid, combined with witch hazel, helps to tighten pores, restore freshness to the skin, and maintain a youthful appearance. Ideal for those seeking smoother skin and a more even complexion.
Why it’s ideal for nursing mums: Witch hazel is a gentle, commonly used postpartum and is generally well-tolerated with no harmful ingredients that could transfer through to breast milk.
2. WOWMD Hyaluronic Acid Serum – Best for deep hydration & plumping
Pregnancy and breastfeeding safe
The WOWMD Hyaluronic Acid Serum is the ideal choice for those seeking deep hydration. This serum contains various types of hyaluronic acids that enable it to penetrate the skin at multiple levels. It offers lasting moisturising power, making the skin plump and hydrated. This serum is a good fit if you are seeking an efficient face moisturiser that manages sensitive skin or a serum that helps diminish fine lines.
Perfect for breastfeeding mums: Hyaluronic acid is completely safe during pregnancy and nursing. It’s a naturally occurring substance that provides crucial hydration, essential when breastfeeding, as it increases your body’s water needs.
3. WOWMD Hydro Balancing Gel-Cream – best lightweight moisturiser
Pregnancy and breastfeeding safe
For oily or combination skin, a light moisturiser is necessary, and the WOWMD Hydro Balancing Gel-Cream is perfectly suited for the task. It moisturises but does not leave the skin greasy, and it creates a smooth and balanced texture. It contains plant oils and antioxidants that keep the skin hydrated, calm, and refreshed, making it an excellent option for sensitive skin care.
Safe for your safe skincare routine for breastfeeding mums: This gentle formula contains no harsh ingredients and is perfect for hormonally sensitive postpartum skin.
4. Beverly Hills MD Lift + Firm Sculpting Cream – Best for skin hydration
Note: Consult your doctor if breastfeeding
The Beverly Hills MD Lift + Firm Sculpting Cream provides both instant relief, whether it is a post-workout recovery or calming irritated skin. This cream, reinforced with Acetyl Dipeptide-1, significantly enhances collagen synthesis and skin hydration, providing a refreshing effect. The Beverly Hills MD Lift + Firm Sculpting Cream is formulated to deliver a lifting effect, promoting a tighter and more youthful skin appearance. It achieves this by utilising a blend of peptides, advanced moisturisers, and natural extracts to enhance dermal elasticity and mitigate sagging.
For nursing mums: While peptides are generally considered safe, always consult your healthcare provider before using advanced anti-ageing products while breastfeeding.
5. WOWMD Dark Spot Serum for sensitive skin – best to target pigmentation gently
Pregnancy and breastfeeding safe
Dark spots and pigmentation are one of the most prevalent problems that bother many individuals, especially pregnant women experiencing melasma (the “pregnancy mask”). The WOWMD Dark Spot Serum Sensitive Skin will target the dark spots without irritating the skin. It is loaded with natural extracts and is effective in the removal of dark spots. It lightens the skin, decreases pigmentation, and functions on even sensitive sections of the skin.
Ideal for a safe skincare routine for breastfeeding mums: This formula uses gentle, natural ingredients instead of hydroquinone (which should be avoided during nursing), making it perfect for treating pregnancy pigmentation safely.
How to build a simple routine
Sample AM/PM routine using these products
Here’s how you can incorporate these products into a simple yet effective morning and evening skincare routine:
AM Routine:
Cleanse with a gentle cleanser
Tone with WOWMD Witch Hazel Pore Perfecting Toner
Apply WOWMD Hyaluronic Acid Serum for hydration
Moisturise with WOWMD Hydro Balancing Gel-Cream
Finish with sunscreen for sun protection(use mineral sunscreen if pregnant or nursing)
PM Routine:
Cleanse and tone
Apply WOWMD Dark Spot Serum for Sensitive Skin for targeted treatment
Use Beverly Hills MD Lift + Firm Sculpting Cream if your skin feels irritated or inflamed (check with doctor if breastfeeding)
Hydrate and lock moisture with WOWMD Hydro Balancing Gel-Cream
Tips for layering and patch testing
When using skincare products, it is always advisable to apply them in the order of thin to thick. Begin with toners, and proceed to serums, and then moisturisers. Patch testing on a small area of your skin can be helpful if you are trying new products, so you will not get irritated, particularly if you have sensitive skin.
Extra important for pregnant and nursing mums: Your skin is more sensitive during pregnancy and postpartum due to hormonal changes. Always patch test for 24-48 hours before applying the whole product.
How to choose what works for you
Match products to concerns
Select products that suit your skin’s needs. In case hydration is the issue to consider, the Hyaluronic Acid Serum or the Hydro Balancing Gel-Cream can be chosen. When you have pigmentation or dark spots, the Dark Spot Serum will address that issue.
Loss of firmness: Beverly Hills MD Cream (with doctor approval)
Sensitive skin considerations
For those with sensitive skin, consider using a range of gentle, non-irritating products. The WOWMD Dark Spot Serum and Beverly Hills MD Lift + Firm Sculpting Cream are formulated to calm and soothe the skin, making them ideal for individuals with sensitive skin.
For pregnant and nursing mums: Choose fragrance-free, minimal-ingredient formulas. Your skin may be more reactive during this time due to hormonal fluctuations.
Ultimately, investing time in selecting suitable products tailored to your skin type and concerns can have a lasting impact. The products mentioned above offer tailored solutions to various skincare needs, including hydration, pore refinement, dark spot reduction, and calming care. Begin creating your own personalised skincare schedule and have healthy, radiant skin.
Q: What’s the Results Timeline for These Products?
A: Results can vary, but with consistent use, you may start noticing improvements within 2-4 weeks. For dark spots on the face, it may take longer, up to 6-8 weeks, to see full results. Be patient – hormonal changes during pregnancy and postpartum can affect how quickly your skin responds.
Q: Can You Combine All These Products?
A: Yes, these products work well together as they address different skin concerns. Just ensure you follow the proper layering order and patch test where necessary. All the WOWMD products are safe for pregnancy and breastfeeding when used together.
Q: What to Do If Irritation Occurs?
A: If irritation occurs, discontinue use and consult a dermatologist. It’s essential to patch tests before using any new products, especially for sensitive skin. During pregnancy and postpartum, your skin may be more reactive than usual.
Q: When can I use retinol again after pregnancy?
A: If you’re breastfeeding, wait until you’ve finished nursing before reintroducing retinol. Once you’ve stopped, consult your healthcare provider. Consider bakuchiol as a safe, plant-based alternative in the meantime.
Q: Are these products safe throughout pregnancy and while nursing?
A: Yes, the WOWMD products listed are safe throughout pregnancy and breastfeeding. For the Beverly Hills MD Lift + Firm Sculpting Cream, consult your healthcare provider due to the peptide content. Always patch test and introduce products one at a time.
Supporting feeding and oral skills (and what doesn’t help speech) through play
As a parent, you’re constantly seeking ways to support your child’s development. But did you know that those adorable raspberry sounds your toddler makes already help them build awareness and control around the mouth? In this article, we will discuss what helps with feeding and oral comfort through daily play (and what doesn’t help speech), because it’s a lot easier (and more fun) than you might think!
What you’ll learn in this guide
Oral play and feeding-focused activities can support your child’s ability to eat safely, manage saliva effectively, and develop awareness and coordination around the lips, tongue, jaw, and cheeks. From blowing bubbles to babbling, these small mouth and jaw movements are part of everyday life. And the best bit? Progress doesn’t just happen in therapy rooms; you can nurture it naturally through playful moments at home.
If you’re looking for practical ways to encourage your toddler’s development at home, introducing easy oral motor activities for toddlers can be a fun and practical starting point. Simple games, silly faces, and playful challenges can strengthen the muscles your child uses to chew and swallow—without it feeling like work for either of you. For speech clarity, though, children need to practise real speech sounds and words (ideally with guidance from a speech and language therapist).
The content provided here is for informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose or treat any medical condition. Always consult your healthcare provider before making decisions related to your child’s health.
Why oral motor development matters for your toddler
Understanding the basics every parent should know
Oral motor skills refer to the movements of the lips, tongue, jaw, and cheeks that support critical functions like eating, drinking, and speaking. These muscles need to be strong, coordinated, and well-controlled for clear speech and safe, adequate feeding.
Struggling to make early sounds like “p”, “m”, or “t” (typically emerging by around 2–3 years)
Having difficulty transitioning from purees to solid foods
Showing frustration during meal times
Experiencing challenges with drinking from cups or straws
Drooling usually reduces markedly by around 18–24 months (with normal variation). If heavy drooling persists beyond the age of 2, have a brief discussion with your GP/health visitor. Playful feeding and oral activities can support comfort and coordination. Please note they aren’t shown to improve speech sounds.
The connection between oral motor skills and overall development
What many parents don’t realise is that oral motor development is intricately connected to your child’s overall growth. Strong oral motor skills support:
Communication Participation: More chances to babble, sing, and chat (speech sounds themselves improve by practising real sounds/words with an SLT)
Nutritional Health: Ability to eat a varied diet safely
Social Skills: Confidence in speaking and eating with others
Sensory Processing: Better tolerance for different textures and sensations
Self-Care Skills: Managing saliva, teeth brushing, and facial hygiene
Play-based strategies that really work
Making development fun and natural
The best way to support oral motor growth at home is by making it playful and pressure-free. Think of it as building strength at the playground, but only for the mouth. Here’s an approach that’s worked wonders with countless families:
Encouraging your child to blow bubbles, whistle, or use a straw can go a long way in exercising the mouth muscles. Even making silly faces in the mirror, pretending to be animals, or licking yoghurt off the lips helps build control and awareness.
You don’t need special equipment or complicated exercises. Instead, turn snack time into a skill-building moment—biting into crunchy carrots, chewing on chewy foods, or sipping through a straw are all activities that engage the jaw and tongue. The goal is to blend development into your child’s routine so that progress happens naturally.
Important for speech: activities like blowing bubbles, using straws, and blowing cheek puffs are great for feeding/oral awareness, but they don’t improve speech sounds. For clearer speech, focus on practising real sounds and words in play (an SLT can show you which ones to target and how).
Point to note
ASHA clearly states:
“There is limited high-quality evidence supporting the use of oral motor exercises or sensory techniques in the treatment of paediatric feeding disorder–related sensory deficits and swallowing dysfunction in isolation” Paediatric Feeding and Swallowing.
Focus Activities: Musical instruments, complex food textures, pretend play with sounds
Expert insight and professional guidance
When to consult a specialist
If you’re unsure whether your child’s oral motor skills are on track, it’s always a good idea to speak with a speech-language pathologist. They can assess your child’s muscle tone, coordination, and movement patterns and recommend targeted exercises if needed.
According to the American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (ASHA) guidelines, early intervention can significantly impact the treatment of motor speech challenges and related delays. The earlier you identify a need and introduce the right supports, the better the outcomes tend to be. Search for a speech-language pathologist who uses evidence-based approaches rather than controversial nonspeech oral motor exercises.
However, even without a formal diagnosis, engaging in playful oral motor activities can still benefit your toddler’s overall development. They can also make your daily routine more engaging, silly, and full of bonding moments.
Red flags that warrant professional assessment
While home-based play is beneficial, some children may require additional support to develop their oral motor skills. Contact your paediatrician if your toddler:
Often gags on age-appropriate foods
Struggles to chew or swallow safely
Has persistently unclear speech beyond expected age
Avoids using their mouth during play
Shows extreme food texture aversions
Experiences frequent choking episodes
Demonstrates tongue thrust beyond 4 years
Has difficulty coordinating breathing while eating
They may recommend an evaluation or therapy to support more structured progress.
Creating an oral motor-friendly environment
Setting up for success at home
Your home environment plays a crucial role in supporting oral motor development. Here’s how to create spaces that encourage natural practice:
Kitchen setup:
Keep straws of various sizes accessible
Store crunchy snacks at toddler eye level
Have wipeable surfaces for messy play
Organise utensils for independent exploration
Play area organisation:
Dedicate a bubble station with different wands
Create a music corner with wind instruments
Set up a mirror at child height
Keep sensory bins with safe oral objects
Bathroom modifications:
Install a step stool for mirror access
Use fun toothbrushes with different textures
Keep cup options for rinsing practice
Add waterproof toys for bath bubble play
Incorporating technology and modern tools
Apps and Digital Resources
While hands-on play is irreplaceable, some digital tools can supplement your efforts:
Speech therapy apps with oral motor games
Video modelling for tongue and lip exercises
Timer apps for exercise duration
Progress tracking applications
Remember, screen time should complement, not replace, physical oral motor activities.
Nutrition’s role in oral motor development
Foods that build strength
Strategic food choices can naturally support oral motor development:
Jaw strengthening foods:
Raw vegetables (carrots, celery, bell peppers)
Whole fruits with skin (apples, pears)
Meat strips and jerky (age-appropriate)
Crusty bread and bagels
Tongue exercise foods:
Nut butters (spread thin for licking)
Lollipops and ice pops
Yoghurt and pudding
Sticky foods like raisins
Lip coordination foods:
Foods requiring pursing (noodles, string cheese)
Items needing precise lip closure (crackers)
Drinks through various straw sizes
Common challenges and solutions
Addressing typical concerns
“My toddler refuses to try new textures” Start with familiar flavours in new textures. Mix preferred foods with challenging ones gradually.
“We’re always rushed in the morning” Incorporate exercises during car rides or while waiting. Even 2-3 minutes helps!
“My child gets frustrated with exercises” Make it sillier! Turn exercises into games and let them lead sometimes.
“I’m worried we’re not doing enough” Quality over quantity—consistent daily practice of even 5 minutes is valuable.
Tracking progress and celebrating wins
Monitoring development
Keep a simple log of:
New sounds mastered
Foods successfully tried
Improved clarity in words
Decreased drooling
Better mealtime behaviours
Celebrate small victories—every bit of progress counts!
Looking ahead: long-term benefits
Helping your child build strong oral motor skills doesn’t have to feel like a therapy session. With a little creativity and consistency, everyday moments can turn into powerful opportunities for growth. Whether you’re making silly faces at the dinner table or encouraging your toddler to blow out pretend birthday candles, you’re doing more than just playing—you’re helping lay the foundation for lifelong skills in speech, feeding, and communication.
The investment you make in oral motor development today pays dividends in:
Academic success through clear communication
Social confidence in peer interactions
Healthy eating habits and nutrition
Strong self-advocacy skills
Reduced need for future interventions
Frequently asked questions
What are oral motor exercises for toddlers?
They’re playful activities that build feeding-related awareness and control around the lips, tongue, jaw, and cheeks—think bubbles, silly faces, crunchy foods, straws, and sound play. Note: current research does not support these activities for improving speech sounds; for speech clarity, children need to practice real sounds/words (ideally with guidance from an SLT).
At what age should I start oral motor exercises with my child?
You can begin simple oral motor activities as early as 6-12 months with age-appropriate exercises like offering textured foods and encouraging babbling. More structured exercises typically start around 12-18 months when toddlers can follow simple directions and engage in purposeful play. Always match activities to your child’s developmental level and interests.
How often should my toddler do oral motor exercises?
Ideally, incorporate oral motor activities into your daily routine rather than scheduling separate exercise sessions. Aim for 5-10 minutes of focused activities 2-3 times per day, but remember that many everyday activities like eating, drinking, and playing naturally provide oral motor practice. Consistency matters more than duration.
What are signs my toddler needs oral motor therapy?
Signs include persistent drooling beyond age 2, difficulty transitioning to solid foods, unclear speech beyond typical developmental stages, frequent gagging or choking, extreme aversions to certain food textures, an open-mouth posture at rest, difficulty using straws or cups, and tongue thrust beyond age 4. Consult your paediatrician if you notice multiple concerns. Most children have completely lost the tongue thrust reflex by age 4 or 5″ Tongue Thrust: Signs, Causes & Treatment and “It naturally fades by age 4 or 5” How Can Tongue Thrust Affect Speech? How It Can Be Treated – Atlanta Health Partners Paediatric Referral Directory.
Can oral motor exercises help with picky eating?
Yes! Oral motor exercises can help picky eaters by improving their ability to manage different food textures, increasing oral awareness, reducing sensitivity to new sensations, and building confidence with chewing and swallowing. Start with play-based activities before introducing challenging foods to reduce mealtime pressure.
What’s the difference between oral motor exercises and speech therapy?
Oral motor exercises focus specifically on strengthening and coordinating the physical muscles used for speech and feeding. Speech therapy is a broader field, addressing language development, articulation, communication strategies, and cognitive-linguistic skills. Oral motor exercises are often one component of comprehensive speech therapy.
Are there any risks to doing oral motor exercises at home?
When done appropriately, oral motor exercises are safe. However, avoid forcing exercises if your child is upset, never use items that pose choking hazards, respect your child’s comfort level, and stop if you notice signs of fatigue or frustration. Always consult a professional if you’re unsure about a specific exercise.
How can I make oral motor exercises fun for my resistant toddler?
Turn exercises into games, let your toddler choose activities, use favourite characters or toys as models, incorporate exercises into pretend play, offer rewards and praise, make it a family activity, keep sessions short and positive, and follow your child’s lead. Remember, if it’s not fun, it’s not sustainable!
What everyday activities naturally promote oral motor development?
Many daily activities support oral motor development: singing songs, brushing teeth, eating varied textures, drinking from different cups, blowing nose, giving kisses, making animal sounds, laughing and talking, chewing gum (age-appropriate), and playing wind instruments. These natural opportunities are just as valuable as structured exercises.
When should I see improvements from oral motor exercises?
With consistent and playful practice, you may notice small improvements in feeding comfort and participation within 2–4 weeks. Bigger shifts in feeding confidence usually take longer. For speech clarity, progress depends on practising specific sounds/words, an SLT can guide you on what to target and how.
Remember, you’re not alone in this journey. Every parent questions whether they’re doing enough for their child’s development. The fact that you’re reading this and seeking ways to support your toddler’s oral motor development indicates that you’re already on the right track. Keep it playful, stay consistent, and celebrate those small wins – they add up to big achievements!
*Collaborative feature post*
Simple breastfeeding tips to keep baby feeling full for longer
During each first year of breastfeeding (I have three babies), I had an oversupply of breastmilk, especially foremilk, and it often felt like I was feeding for hours on end. I remember one particular incident when I breastfed my eldest for almost three hours while watching two movies back to back. Two hours later, he was hungry again.
Very first breastfeeding experience after Aron’s birth
If you’re breastfeeding and you feel like a human milk bottle, then let me introduce you to Jacqui Nancey who is a Registered Midwife, Lactation Consultant and Baby care/Sleep Specialist!
Jacqui has created Nature’s Four Course Beginner Breastfeeding Tips and Tricks, which are simple breastfeeding latching tips to help your nursing baby feel full for longer. As well as teaching mothers how to breastfeed successfully, Jacqui also offers advice on the following:
“How do I satisfy my breastfeeding baby? Why does my 6+ week old keep waking every 45-60 mins after feeding for ages on both breasts, yet he wants to feed again each time I think he is asleep and I try to settle him down in his crib? I am exhausted from feeding him constantly and totally sleep-deprived, yet my baby’s appetite keeps growing every passing day and week.”
Walking robotic mum
This mum’s reality of accruing mental stress, daily sleep deprivation, and psycho-social fatigue, is a major risk factor for:
recurring negative mood swings which could lead to postpartum depression, or even escalate to maternal psychosis should the mother be susceptible to mental health risk factors if not properly supported
slow postnatal recovery, or even morbidity after childbirth
the potential for marital conflict and challenging family dynamics
poor mother and baby parenting skills and emotional attachment…
Does stress affect breastfeeding?
Breastfeeding for new moms can be stressful, but increased levels of the stress hormone cortisol can also reduce overall breast milk supply, and delay the let-down reflex of milk release.
Mental, physical, and emotional stress can also have a negative impact on breastmilk supply and quality, as well as hinder the normal function of your breastfeeding hormones, prolactin, and oxytocin, which are produced by your brain’s hypothalamus. Stress can affect the delicate balance between your milk production, milk release, breast milk supply, and the quality richness of your milk.
Benefits of a stress-free experience when breastfeeding a baby
Breastfeeding is meant to relax the mind, soothe the body, and be a comfortable experience overall for mother and baby.
However, if you are feeling moody, tired, or mentally fatigued, then the actual quality and volume of your breast milk will eventually be compromised, from a creamy baby milk texture to a very light and unsatisfying breast milk quality. You may also find it difficult for your baby to latch-on easily at the start of some feeds throughout the day or night time feeding sessions.
Therefore, the more relaxed nursing mothers are, the better their mood and psycho-social well-being will contribute to the creamy QUALITY density and volume of breastmilk, which increases the chances of breastfeeding success.
Here are some other benefits of breastfeeding:
Being happy has a positive impact on breastmilk supply and quality
Happy hormones in your bloodstream are released into your breastmilk, which can directly contribute to your baby’s sense of relaxation and satisfaction from the creamy density of your milk supply. Plus, the sleep-inducing effect of the natural morphine hormone is found in your HIND-breast milk, so you need to make sure baby is feeding for longer enough to get to that back milk.
Follow a good breastfeeding diet and encourage positive family dynamics
Your breast milk volume plus rich quality in terms of its nutritional value, creamy density and baby satisfaction can be improved and sustained by ensuring you are:
➢ Well rested and psycho-socially at peace with your inner self and home environment
➢ Practically well-supported by your immediate family
➢ You eat and drink nutritional meals, foods and snacks
The following brief will focus on three breastfeeding tips (for first-time mothers especially), to experience relaxed breastfeeding from day one:
1. Soothing Breast-Softening massage
The best mind and body-relaxing pre-feed preparation tools for mums
2. Pain-free baby latching
The latch is extremely important to encourage the baby to suckle and enhance breast milk let-down. Latch also ensures breastfeeding enjoyment, so the milk comes easily. Make sure to wipe the baby’s face gently after each feed to prevent a milk rash forming.
3. Satisfying baby at every feed
Use the four-course breastfeeding tricks to satisfy your breastfeeding baby
1. Breast-softening massage
Always start your day with the side your baby does not naturally seem to prefer. By nursing this way, you will naturally ensure that both breasts have a good supply on both sides of your breasts.
Start the breast-preparation massage to relax, soften and ease the breast skin and ducts into pain-free breastmilk release and nursing
Sit comfortably in a well-supported comfy chair. Have a clean hand towel on your lap, plus a bowl of edible sunflower or olive oil next to you if there are no familial allergies
Half-strip only by taking the blouse and nursing bra off on one side of your chest. Start with the breast that produces the lesser from the two. This is because one breast always seems to have bigger ducts than the other, which explains why most babies naturally prefer the faster-flow breast side than the one with the slower flow or narrower ducts
Use a gentle oil salve and rub some oil in both your palms. Gently salve all over the breast tissue
Place one of your wrists within the crest of your torso – to provide leverage with your open palm for the breast to be massaged. ALWAYS MASSAGE ONE BREAST AT A TIME, as massaging both will leave you soaking in breastmilk from the side your baby would not be suckling on.
With the other palm, use the ball of the palm to gently massage the side of your breast from the arm-pit to the areola five times
After these initial 5X armpit massages, use that same palm as leverage on that side of the breast. Then proceed the same gentle massage 5X with the other palm from crest to the areola
Move one palm to support by cupping the underside of that same breast. Then use the other palm to gently massage – always using the ball of your palm – from the shoulder blade to the areola X5
For the finale, simply use the shoulder blade massaging palm to support the entire top-side of the breast. Then use the other ball of the palm to likewise massage the entire underside of your breast by starting from the rib-cage muscle, breast underside right up to the same breast areola
Best times for your breast massage
You can massage your breast any time you feel full and engorged, i.e. from your 3 am – 11 am feeds, as this is usually the time when your breasts will be full, hard, engorged and probably painful to touch
Soft breast skin and a pliable areola means that it is a lot easier for your hungry baby to suckle from your areola
2. Pain-free baby latching
Pain-free breastfeeding starts with the correct attachment of the baby’s mouth around your areola, instead of the baby’s lips and jaws clamping onto your tender nipple tissue.
A good breast-feeding latch-on means that the soft and massaged breast tissue, makes it a lot easier for your baby to open their mouth much wider around the areola, instead of focussing on the nipple alone.
Babies are clever and will quickly notice when the breast is hard to suckle. They will get frustrated because they will find it difficult to fit a hard and engorged balloon into their mouth, hence why they seem to naturally clamp onto your nipple alone, each time you try to nurse them – with full and hard breast tissue.
Parenting Tip: Baby Gas or Colic Relief
Should your baby suffer from the two tummy discomforts, you could offer them some Woodwards gripe water tonic.
Mix 5mls in 3oz of warm boiled water and offer your baby 1oz 30 mins before the 6/7 am feed, 10/11 am and the 5 pm feeds.
3. Satisfying baby at every feed
The Four-Course Breastfeeding Approach is the easiest way to make sure the baby gets to the rich HIND milk during and after every breastfeeding session. The result is a baby who feeds lustily from start to finish and is satisfied after every feeding session. Thus, they have a full tummy and is happily settled plus sleeping well during the day or night breastfeeding sessions. Otherwise, when the baby keeps waking up for small, frequent and short breastfeeding feeding sessions, this type of commonly adapted breastfeeding approach is known as the:
SNACK breastfeeding method.
SNACK-breastfeeding means that although your baby feeds frequently, their overall appetite is not fully pacified, hence why they keep waking up every 45-60 mins throughout the day or night.
Yet for most healthy six-week-old babies, born at term gestation and with no compromising psycho-social risk factors, you would expect to start sleeping for at least 2-3 plus hour intervals in between their day or night feed, which can result in an ongoing cycle of stress and parental sleep-deprivation, the older their baby gets.
However, the Four-Course Breastfeeding Approach is nature’s way to satisfy your baby’s appetite from day one.
If you have ever expressed breast milk and left it to settle for later use in the fridge, you can see the three stages of your breast milk quality ‘titrate’ or separate themselves into three noticeable layers.
When breastmilk is made by the breast milk-making cells known as the acinar cells, the result is a release and increase of breastmilk supply which comes as a combination of three types of breastmilk densities as follows:
Stage 1 – TOP milk
This is the thirst-quenching feed-starter
Stage 2. MIDDLE milk
This is the semi-skimmed milk appetiser
Stage 3. HIND-milk
This is the toffee-rich super creamy nectar
Significantly, even though ALL breastmilk is nutritious, it seems like it is naturally released in three stages, which naturally changes from Stage 1 to Stage 3, as the feed progresses to pacify your baby’s appetite.
Mothers who use the Four-Course Breastfeeding Approach, find that from start to finish, a typical breastfeeding session would naturally last at least 45 minutes of the active baby nursing, taking burping breaks after every 10 mins when needed.
Stage 1 – TOP milk -Thirst-quenching feed-starter
Have you noticed how most babies wake up in a feeding frenzy? This is because they aree feeling both thirsty and super-hungry at the same time.
So nature designed this initial Stage 1 milk to assuage their thirst first. Stage 1 breast is found at the very base of your milk ducts, located at the front of your breast anatomy/areola. This TOP breast milk is very light in colour, thin in density and often has a chalky-greyish hue.
Although it makes up as much as 60-70% of your entire breast milk supply and is very nutritious, its thin density is NOT very satisfying for babies. Which explains why switching sides at the moment your baby stops nursing, will leave most exclusively fed nursing babies feeling constantly peckish – hence the frequent baby-feeding bouts and very limited sleeping episodes.
Quick Tip – COLIC-Relief baby-burping Massage
Once your baby starts falling asleep on the breast after the first ten minutes of their thirst-quenching initial feed, it is your cue to wake them up gently by applying the COLIC-Relief baby-burping massage.
As soon as you have applied the baby-burping colic-relief massage, your baby will immediately wake up and route for a feed. The baby-burping massage naturally quickens the release of breastfeeding into the stomach, instead of the usual 45+ mins it normally takes for this milk to reach the baby’s stomach from the feeding tube.
The beauty of the colic-relief baby burping massage is that it will keep your baby avidly interested, happy, and awake throughout your entire breastfeeding session from start to finish – hence why it is naturally done in-between each of your baby’s breastfeeding sessions.
Instead of switching sides, you are encouraged to latch your baby onto the same side for this second time.
You will also notice that your baby will not be as frenzied in their suckling as in the initial Stage 1 milk intake. This is because your baby is at least 3/4s full from the Stage 1 milk.
Also, Stage 2 milk is creamier in density than the skimmed density of Stage 1 milk. As seen by its light yellowish colour and it is also more satisfying for the baby’s appetite than Stage 1 milk.
Stage 2 milk is therefore called the semi-skimmed breast milk appetizer, since it’s quality of milk richness falls between the very light Stage 1 milk quality of skimmed milk density and the very rich Stage 3 toffee milk.
It is not only the QUANTITY and VOLUME of breast milk that satisfies baby, but it is the QUALITY and RICHNESS of any given feed that pacifies both your baby’s hunger and feeding urges.
Hence why adapting the Four-Course Breastfeeding Approach, results in your baby starting to calm down after another 8-10 mins of taking the Stage 2 milk.
Usually, your baby’s Stage 2 milk intake will last between 8-10 mins of a medium-slow baby feeding pace, unlike the frenzied rapid feeding, pace witnessed at stage 1.
Towards the end of Stage 2 milk, your baby’s feeding pace will eventually slow down significantly until they get to what we call the intermittent baby feeding pace when you will notice your baby begin to feed in bits of tiny suckles in a drowsy state before literally falling off the breast half asleep.
Medical caution
If your baby is unwell, dehydrated or on any kind of medical fluid balance assessments, then very often the volume aspect of your baby’s feeds will be the priority to follow as per your paediatric advice.
Stage 3 – HIND-milk – Toffee rich super creamy nectar
Have you ever noted how thick and creamy this milk density is!
Every single baby loves this Stage 3 milk quality and though every breastfeeding session has it in different measures throughout any 24hr time frame – you can get most of this Stage 3 milk between the 3 am – 12 pm breastfeeds.
It is generally full fat in density, has a sticky texture and is super-sweet, hence why its called ‘toffee sweet’. It also comes with a natural dose of ‘morphine’ properties that are naturally designed to make your baby have a deep sound sleep after every Four-Course breastfeeding session.
Given the rich density and satisfying quality of this Stage 3 breast milk, this session usually lasts only 5-8 mins in total, before your cherub looks pretty dazed and super sleepy.
This is also your cue to change your baby’s nappy immediately after the burping massage. A soothing and gentle warm water nappy change will immediately wake up your drowsy baby enough to keep them contented and alert, before your Fourth Course breastfeeding finale – which will occur from your second breast.
If you try to feed your baby straight after the aesthetic nappy change, your baby will be reluctant to feed so soon, or simply spit up when fed that soon. Hence the 15-20 min mini-break.
Therefore, settling your baby in a recliner, while you grab a snack, shower, or check on your emails gives you that much-needed break away from the feeling of constantly feeding over the last 30 minutes.
Quick Tip
Settling your baby in a gentle recliner will ease your baby’s digestion for about 15-20 mins
Fourth Course – Change Breastfeeding side
Generally, most babies from age 0-3 months post-partum can only stay awake for 1-hour in-between feeds before falling into a deep 2-3 hour sleep, depending on your breastfeeding technique and family home psycho-social dynamics.
This way we start the 3-stage breastfeeding technique on one side A, to begin with, which normally lasts for 30 minutes. By the end of this 30 minutes on breast A, your baby would be at least 80% full and looking like they are ready to sleep soundly.
After 15-20 mins mother and baby take a break, and your baby will start to get visibly restless, sleepy, and unsettled. This is your baby’s cue to let you know they are now ready to resume the Fourth-course stage of their entire breastfeeding session.
You can now SWITCH sides by offering your baby the now massaged Breast B, because it would be naturally so full and engorged by now. Besides, after taking the rich density of the HIND-milk quality, your baby will naturally need the thirst-quenching milk to wash it.
This final stage will only take 5-10 minutes on the new side before your baby is ready for a good two+ hour’s sleep.
Conclusion
While we understand how draining the reality of exclusive breastfeeding can be for most postnatal mums’ mental and physical faculties, we hope that the practical breastfeeding for newborn support tips shared in this brief will offer you a much easier breastfeeding experience instead of the chronic weariness when trying to satisfy a ‘snack-fed’ baby.
Normalise breastfeeding during pregnancy and tandem feeding
A breastfeeding Mum from Perth, Australia ignores the noise of other’s opinions and tunes in to her inner voice when it comes to breastfeeding during pregnancy and tandem feeding with her toddler and newborn.
So many people are quick to judge. Strangers on the street, the medical profession, family, friends, the list goes on. While breastfeeding my three-year-old daughter during pregnancy, advice and opinions were given to me all the time wherever I went. I had to hear that my “milk was poison”, “the baby would be born prematurely”, “it’s NOT normal”, “you need to stop”, “she is using you as a pacifier”, “it’s not good”!
Breastfeeding during pregnancy and tandem feeding is my normal
Breastfeeding while pregnant and tandem feeding after birth is my “normal” and my “moo moo time” story.
Guess what I did? I let it go and I didn’t listen. My breastfeeding relationship is my own and I did what felt right for me and my children. I listened to my intuition.
I ignored the ignorant! I will repeat. I ignored the ignorant!
I call bullshit on all the opinions. I did not allow it to get to me and most importantly, I did not allow it to change what I intuitively felt lwas right and natural for my daughter and my body. The first photo was taken one week before I gave birth at 38 weeks pregnant. The second photo was 2 weeks after. I naturally delivered my baby boy with no complications, happy and healthy on an island in the Mediterranean far away from my hometown, Perth, Australia.
How I make tandem nursing a toddler and newborn work
I’m currently still nursing breastfeeding my 3-year-old daughter and my newborn and it’s all ok! Mother’s milk is not poison, the baby was born full-term and healthy and everyone is content and happy. I share our version of “normal” captured in this photo with you hoping stories and images like this make breastfeeding, extended breastfeeding, tandem breastfeeding and breastfeeding during pregnancy normal for all. For the females that get given all this advice, do your own research, listen to your own intuition and body. It is your body and your choice!
The female body and its human milk supply is simply incredible and we need to celebrate, encourage and support one another, not bring each other down.
“Moo Moo time” is what both my children would say when they wanted/want breast milk. It’s a name that my first nursing child came up with and it has stayed in our family ever since. “Moo moo time” was created after I posted a picture of breastfeeding my daughter while 9 months pregnant to a small breastfeeding support group in order to share what “normal” looks like in our house. It created a lot of curiosity, questions, admiration and a fair share of ignorance and backlash. I was criticised for my hair, my bra and told to go put my clothes back on by females and males (I inhaled and exhaled and ignored that part).
I’m here to address it all and be part of normalising breastfeeding worldwide. After 6 consecutive years of breastfeeding my children and now tandem feeding my 3-year-old daughter and newborn with no intention of weaning yet, I have been inspired to create “moo moo time” to raise awareness, share education, experiences, stories, ask for advice on topics of not only breastfeeding but also parenthood, pregnancy, birth and beyond.
Tandem nursing mothers, join me to normalise the most natural act in the world and share your moo moo stories and questions! A study showing family physicians supporting tandem feeding can be found here.
Facebook Page: Moo Moo Time
Instagram: moo_moo_time
FAQ
What is tandem nursing and is it safe?
“WHO and UNICEF recommend that children initiate breastfeeding within the first hour of birth and be exclusively breastfed for the first 6 months of life – meaning no other foods or liquids are provided, including water. Infants should be breastfed on demand – that is as often as the child wants, day and night.”
World Health Organization
Other questions asked were:
What is tandem breastfeeding?
What does tandem feeding mean?
What is tandem feeding?
What does tandem mean in breastfeeding?
Reasons for tandem breastfeeding?
Why tandem nurse?
Benefits of tandem nursing?
Benefits of extended breastfeeding?
Is it good to tandem breastfeed?
Benefits of tandem breastfeeding?
Tandem nursing refers to breastfeeding two babies different ages, one child tends to be older and the other is younger. This can occur when a mother continues to breastfeed her older children after giving birth.
Breastfeeding tandem is generally considered safe for both the mother and her children, provided the mother is healthy, eating a balanced diet, and staying hydrated to support the increased milk production. You can even try tandem nursing while pregnant as long as you are fit and healthy to do so.
There are several benefits to breastfeeding a toddler and newborn. For the mother, it can help continue the bonding experience with the older child and help to manage the engorgement that often comes with a new milk supply for the new baby. For the older child, it can provide continued access to the nutrition and immune support offered by breastmilk. It can also be a source of comfort and help them adjust to a new sibling.
That said, breastfeeding 2 babies different ages can also be challenging. It can be physically demanding and time-consuming. You may also face criticism or lack of understanding from others, as it’s less commonly practiced in some cultures. It’s crucial if you choose to breastfeeding in tandem you ensure you’re taking good care of your own health and well-being too.
If you want to how to tandem nurse, you should discuss it with a healthcare provider, lactation consultant, or other professional who can provide guidance based on your individual situation and needs.
What are the different types of tandem nursing?
There aren’t necessarily “types” of tandem nursing, but the practice can look different depending on the ages of the children, your comfort, and the preferences of the family. Some examples could include:
Breastfeeding second baby with toddler: Nursing a toddler and a newborn is perhaps the most common scenario for tandem feeding. The toddler may only nurse a few times a day, such as before naps or at bedtime, while the newborn will nurse frequently throughout the day and night.
Nursing two infants (twins or triplets): This isn’t traditionally what people mean when they say “tandem feeding,” but it technically fits the definition. Here, you might baby tandem nurse at the same time to save time and ensure both babies are feeding regularly.
Nursing a newborn and an older child: Some children continue to breastfeed for several years. Here, the older child might nurse less frequently and more for comfort than nutrition, while the newborn’s needs will be more intensive.
Do you have any tips for tandem nursing breastfeeding an infant and toddler?
Other questions asked were:
How does tandem nursing work?
Can I breastfeed my 2 year old and newborn?
What if I decide tandem nursing isn’t for me?
Tandem feeding can be a rewarding but also challenging experience. Here are some tips to help make it a bit easier:
Prioritise the youngest baby: The newborn’s nutritional needs should be a priority. If you’re nursing both an older child and a newborn, try to feed the newborn first to ensure they’re getting enough of the nutrient-rich foremilk and fattier hindmilk.
Stay hydrated and eat well: Producing breast milk for two or more children can be physically demanding, and you’ll need to take in extra fluids and nutrients to keep up. Make sure you’re eating a balanced diet and drinking plenty of water.
Find comfortable positions: Experiment with different breastfeeding positions that allow you to nurse both children if that’s your goal. For example, the “double-cradle” hold, with one child in a traditional cradle hold and the other in a cradle hold facing the opposite direction, might work. A lactation consultant can provide guidance here.
Get support: Surround yourself with people who understand and support your decision to tandem feed. A local breastfeeding or parenting support group can be an excellent resource.
Establish boundaries: It’s okay to set limits with your older child. You might limit nursing to certain times of day, or certain locations, or you might set a time limit on each nursing session.
Prepare your older child: If you’re pregnant and tandem feeding, begin talking to your older child about the new baby and how things will change. Explain that the new baby will also breastfeed, just like they do.
Take care of yourself: Beyond your physical health, don’t forget to take care of your emotional well-being. It’s okay to ask for help when you need it, whether that’s with household chores, caring for the kids, or just taking a bit of time for yourself.
Be flexible: Your tandem feeding relationship with each child is likely to be different and will continue to evolve as they grow and their needs change. Be prepared to adapt as needed.
And remember, it’s okay if tandem feeding isn’t working for you or your children. The goal is a happy, healthy family, and there are many ways to achieve that. Discuss with your healthcare provider or a lactation consultant if you’re feeling unsure or overwhelmed.
What breastfeeding positions work best for tandem nursing?
Other questions asked were:
Best positions for tandem nursing?
How do you tandem nurse?
How does tandem breastfeeding work?
How to tandem breastfeed?
How does tandem feeding work?
How to start tandem feeding?
When it comes to tandem feeding, finding comfortable positions for both you and your children is key. Here are some common tandem nursing positions that can work well:
Double cradle hold: This position involves placing each child in a traditional cradle hold, one on each arm, with their heads resting on your forearms and their bodies across your stomach. This can work well if you have two infants or a baby and a toddler. For an older toddler, you might need to have them sit next to you and lean in to feed.
Cradle hold and football hold combo: In this position, you would place the younger baby in a cradle hold, while the older child or toddler is positioned in a football hold, tucked under your arm. This can give you more control, particularly if your older child is larger.
Double football hold: Both children are positioned like footballs under your arms. This can be a good position for breastfeeding twins and can also work well if you’ve had a C-section, as it puts less pressure on your abdomen.
Laid-back or biological nurturing position: In this position, you recline back on a bed or couch, and each child lies on top of you, straddling your stomach or hips. This can be a very comfortable position and is often helpful for encouraging good latch, particularly in newborns.
Parallel position: This position can work well if you’re nursing an infant and a toddler. The younger baby is in a cradle or football hold, while the older child lays parallel to you, with their head at your breast and their body extending behind you.
Remember, it may take a bit of trial and error to find positions that work well for you and your children. A lactarian consultant can be a valuable resource in helping you find comfortable positions for tandem feeding.
How to wean a tandem nursing toddler?
Weaning a tandem feeding toddler may be a sensitive issue, especially as the child sees the younger sibling continue to breastfeed. Here are some strategies to make the process smoother:
Gradual weaning: Gradually reducing the nursing sessions can be less abrupt and stressful for the toddler. You could start by eliminating one feed at a time, giving your toddler time to adjust to each change.
Don’t offer, don’t refuse: This is a gentle approach where you don’t offer to nurse but also don’t refuse if your toddler asks to. Over time, your toddler may naturally lose interest and ask to nurse less often.
Distraction and postponement: Try distracting your toddler with other activities when they ask to nurse. Or you can tell them “not now, but later,” and they may forget or move on to something else.
Shorten nursing sessions: Gradually reduce the length of each nursing session. You might find it helpful to sing a short song while your toddler is nursing and then end the session when the song is over.
Introduce the concept of “Big Kid” activities: Explain to your toddler that there are certain things only big kids get to do, and one of them is moving on from nursing. Highlight the positive aspects of growing up, like being able to eat more different foods, play certain games, etc.
Provide alternatives: Offer comforting alternatives to nursing, such as cuddling, reading a book, or giving your toddler a favourite soft toy. Also, make sure that your toddler is getting plenty of nutritious foods and drinks as they nurse less.
Be consistent: Once you’ve decided to wean, try to be consistent. It can be confusing for your toddler if you allow them to nurse one day, but not the next.
Be patient and understanding: Weaning can be a challenging time for both you and your toddler. Try to be patient and understanding of your toddler’s needs. If your toddler is having a hard time, it’s okay to slow down the process.
Remember, there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to weaning, and different strategies will work for different families. If you’re struggling with weaning, it might be helpful to speak with a lactation consultant or your child’s pediatrician for guidance.
How common is tandem nursing?
Tandem feeding isn’t uncommon, but it’s not universally practiced, either. The practice can vary depending on cultural, personal, and medical factors.
In some cultures, extended breastfeeding and tandem feeding are widely accepted and practiced. However, in many Western societies where breastfeeding beyond infancy is less common, tandem feeding may be less frequently seen.
Whether a mother practices tandem feeding can be influenced by a range of factors, such as her comfort level, her health, the advice of healthcare providers, and the needs and ages of her children. For example, if a woman becomes pregnant while still breastfeeding an older child, she might choose to wean the older child due to discomfort or medical advice, or she might decide to continue breastfeeding through her pregnancy and after the birth of the new baby.
While tandem feeding is a personal decision and not necessary for every family, it’s an option that can work well for many. It’s always a good idea for any mother considering tandem feeding to seek advice from a healthcare provider or lactation consultant to make an informed decision based on her individual circumstances.
How do you prepare an older child for tandem nursing?
Preparing an older child for tandem feeding requires careful communication, empathy, and patience. Here are some strategies you can consider:
Start before the new baby arrives: Begin talking about the new baby well before their arrival, and include discussions about breastfeeding. Use simple, age-appropriate language to explain that the new baby will need to nurse a lot, just like they did when they were a baby.
Read books: There are many children’s books available that talk about new siblings, breastfeeding, and the changes that come with a growing family. These can help your older child understand what’s going to happen in a fun and engaging way.
Show and tell: If you have friends or family members who are breastfeeding, it might be helpful to let your older child see this happening. You could also use dolls or stuffed animals to show your child how you’ll be nursing the new baby.
Reassure your child: Reassure your older child that they are still important and loved. Discuss how they will always be your “first baby” and have a special place in your heart.
Set expectations: If you plan to continue nursing your older child, explain how this will work. You might tell them that the new baby will need to nurse first, or that there will be certain times when they can nurse and other times when they’ll need to wait.
Practice patience: If your older child is still nursing, there may be times when both your children want to nurse at the same time. You can practice telling your older child to wait their turn, and praising them for their patience.
Provide alternatives: If you plan to wean your older child from breastfeeding, start introducing alternatives to breastfeeding for comfort and nutrition.
Remember, every child is unique and will react differently to the news of a new sibling and the changes that come with tandem feeding. It’s important to be patient and understanding during this transition.
Are there any side effects of breastfeeding while pregnant?
Other questions asked were:
Safety concerns of breastfeeding while pregnant?
What are the cons of tandem nursing?
Is tandem feeding bad?
Is tandem feeding safe?
Ias tandem breastfeeding safe?
Is tandem nursing safe?
Is tandem nursing healthy?
Potential drawbacks to tandem nursing?
Should I tandem breastfeed?
What are the challenges of tandem nursing?
Is tandem nursing hard?
La Leche International says:
“You can breastfeed while pregnant; some mothers go on to nurse both their new baby and their older child after the birth. This is known as ‘tandem nursing’. Family, friends and healthcare professionals may express concern if you are breastfeeding while pregnant.”
La Leche League
Breastfeeding while pregnant is generally safe for most people, but it can come with some discomforts or potential side effects. These can include:
Nipple tenderness: Hormonal changes during pregnancy can cause nipple tenderness or sensitivity, which may be amplified by breastfeeding.
Fatigue: Pregnancy itself can be tiring, and the added demands of breastfeeding can contribute to feelings of fatigue.
Nutritional demands: Both pregnancy and breastfeeding increase your body’s demand for certain nutrients. Therefore, it’s important to maintain a well-balanced diet to support your own health and the growth of your unborn baby, as well as milk production for your nursing child.
Uterine contractions: Breastfeeding can cause the release of the hormone oxytocin, which can lead to uterine contractions. These are generally mild and not a concern, but for those with a history of preterm labour or certain other pregnancy complications, there may be a potential risk.
Decrease in milk supply: Hormonal changes during pregnancy may lead to a decrease in milk supply. Additionally, the composition of breast milk changes towards the end of pregnancy, preparing for the newborn’s needs. These changes may lead your older child to wean naturally.
Emotional considerations: Some pregnant people may find that they experience feelings of irritability or aversion during breastfeeding. This phenomenon, known as nursing aversion and agitation (NAA), can be a natural reaction to the hormonal shifts of pregnancy.
If you’re pregnant and considering continuing to breastfeed, it’s important to discuss it with your healthcare provider. They can guide you based on your personal health status, your pregnancy, and any potential risks or concerns.
Does tandem nursing burn more calories?
Yes, tandem feeding typically burns more calories. Breastfeeding in general is a calorie-intensive process, as your body needs extra energy to produce milk.
On average, it’s often said that breastfeeding can burn around 500 extra calories per day for one baby. However, this can vary depending on factors like the frequency and duration of feedings, the age of the child (as older children who nurse less frequently will require less milk), and individual metabolic factors.
When you are tandem feeding, you’re producing milk for two children, so it’s reasonable to expect that the caloric demands would be higher than nursing a single child.
But while tandem feeding may increase calorie burn, it’s crucial for mothers to remember that they need to replenish those calories with nutritious food to maintain their energy and health. Always ensure you’re eating a balanced, nutrient-dense diet and drinking plenty of water. If you have any concerns about your diet or energy levels while tandem feeding, it’s a good idea to consult with a healthcare provider or a dietitian.
How long have women been tandem nursing?
Tandem feeding, or the practice of breastfeeding two children of different ages is likely as old as humanity itself. It’s difficult to determine exactly when this practice started, but it’s safe to say that women have been tandem feeding for thousands of years.
In prehistoric times and throughout much of human history, birth control options were limited or nonexistent, and it was common for women to have many children in relatively quick succession. Extended breastfeeding was also common, as there were no alternatives like modern formula. Therefore, situations where a woman was breastfeeding a toddler or older child and then had a new baby to breastfeed were likely quite common, leading to the necessity of tandem feeding.
Even today, tandem feeding is practiced in many cultures around the world, especially in societies where extended breastfeeding is the norm. While it may be less common in societies where breastfeeding beyond infancy is less typical, it’s still a choice that many families make based on their individual needs and preferences.
So while we can’t pinpoint a specific time or place where tandem feeding began, it’s a practice rooted deeply in human history and biology.
Can I continue tandem feeding when one is sick?
Generally, yes, you can continue tandem feeding even when one child is sick. In fact, continuing to breastfeed can be beneficial as breast milk provides important antibodies and immune factors that can help your child fight off illness. It’s also a source of comfort and hydration, especially important when a child is not feeling well.
It’s important to note, however, that good hygiene practices should be observed to avoid transmitting the illness between siblings. Frequent hand washing and trying to keep the children from coughing or sneezing on each other can help.
Keep in mind, if your sick child has a contagious illness that’s passed through close contact, such as the flu or COVID-19, the healthy child may already have been exposed by the time symptoms appear. You should follow your healthcare provider’s guidance for managing the illness and reducing the risk of transmission.
If you or your sick child has a specific condition that you’re worried about or if the child is seriously ill, always consult with a healthcare provider. They can provide guidance based on the specific situation and circumstances.
My breastfeeding experience got me down
My sister-in-law was the first person ever I knew who breastfed because on my side of the family, no-one had ever attempted it; I was determined to be the first. I was ready to possibly struggle a little bit and maybe have sore breasts, but breastfeeding was my only option.
My beautiful little girl arrived and after a quick check over, she was put on my chest and, tears in my eyes, I will never ever forget that moment when she turned her head to my breast and so naturally started sucking; oh wow, what a strange and amazing feeling it was to feel something going through my breast and being sucked by my little girl!
As she was born in the evening, we stayed overnight in Broadlands at the Princess Anne hospital and discharged ourselves early morning to go straight to the New Forest Birthing Centre (a midwives only led centre) as there was a space available. Unfortunately, by the time our little girl was not even one day old, I realised that my breastfeeding experience was going to be much harder than I expected. My little girl was happy to sleep pretty much all day – the dream of many parents – which means that feeding was the last thing on her mind. The midwives at the centre were ever so patient and we tried so many things to keep her awake (stocking her head, putting a damp flannel on her, stripping her down to her nappy, taking the nappy off and so on) but after a few minutes of sucking she would fall asleep again. After four days at the Birthing Centre, her weight was still more than 10% lower than her birth weight and despite the worries of the midwives, we decided to go home where I would be more relaxed and in my environment.
But the breastfeeding did not improve. We went twice to Breastfeeding Babes at the hospital and despite some good advice, my little girl was still not feeding much. To make things worse, she suffered from reflux which meant that I had to keep her upright for at least one hour after each feed, in the hope she would keep it down. My health visitor was coming to see us at home every two days and after two weeks of struggle and my little girl’s weight still not being anywhere near her birth weight, she suggested formula. Up to that point, I was already in tears two or three times a day and that suggestion tipped me over the edge and broke my heart. I am lucky to have a supportive husband and family but still, I had failed my daughter! To stop me going into depression mode, my husband convinced me to agree to the formula feed and within a week, my daughter started to feed better.
She now is 3 years old and still not a big eater – unless you give her cheese which she could eat by the bucket. I am still unhappy about my breastfeeding experience but I am now able to talk about it without getting too upset (but still with a few tears in my eyes) and feel it is very important for me to share my experience so that other mums in similar situations know that they are not alone. So my advice to any pregnant women is to make a list now (while you are still pregnant), with the names and contact details of Breastfeeding counsellors and find out where your local breastfeeding support groups are. Once you have done this contact list, give a copy of this list to your partner and close family so that they can ask for support if you are not in the right frame of mind to seek for help yourself. Check out www.nct.org.uk, or ask your midwife now for any of those contact details.
But my most important advice is to be happy with your choice. If breastfeeding does not work, if it doesn’t feel right, if it stresses you out too much, then use formula (or do a combination of both). If you’re struggling for options, there is a range of baby formula available at Pharmacy2u.My husband and I are hoping to have a second child and I will most definitely try to breastfeed again – but this time, I will be more prepared. I will have my support contact list ready months before the due date and I will also have formula at hand, just in case.
Good luck
How I Lost Breastfeeding and Got it Back
Someone I know once said to me that becoming a mother for the first time was “a bit of a shock to the system”. At the time I thought it had to be one of the most extreme understatements I had ever heard.
Perhaps one of the strangest aspects of having a live human being come out of your body is its need to stay attached. Not simply to be held but to clamp on to tender nipples and suck like a piranha.
While the last thing I’d want to do is sound negative about the nursing relationship, a relationship that my daughter and I gained so much from, I think it’s a shame that so many women are still going into it with widely perpetuated false expectations. The biggest of these, and I beg to differ with many creators of instructional videos here, is that it doesn’t hurt starting out if you are doing it correctly. If you believe this, then you are likely to believe you are not doing it correctly in the beginning, when in fact you may very well be doing it just fine.
In my experience, succeeding and carrying on for any length of time means walking through the fire. One friend of mine was told by a midwife to ‘grit her teeth until she came down off the ceiling’. If your nipples are bloodied and even oozing, it is generally advisable to stick it out if you want to carry on nursing. Women with breast infections, of course, need to be treated but even then there’s no real break. Nipple shields sound like an answer but they are not. I know of a case where nipple shields led to the baby not stimulating the nipples properly, resulting in the child not gaining weight: it was probably not an isolated scenario.
Aside from the hardcore ‘just rub breast milk on the region’ advice, there are some ways to soothe some initial pain. Safe ointments and cooled pieces of rubber can be placed over the nipple and areola when not feeding. Yet the fact is that the cracking, bleeding and wincing are all too common terrain that we walk over: or that every nursing mother I know has walked over. The heat from coals burning our proverbial feet forges us – in nursing as well as in the rest of life.
My story with nursing begins with some bruises nearly all of us go through at first birth. I’d been torn badly in delivery. My husband had to leave the US to return to England when our daughter was four days old. I was staying at my parents’ house in New Jersey, trying to face the nights alone. One morning at around 5 AM when my daughter was two-and-a-half weeks old, I felt I couldn’t cope with her seemingly endless demand. I gave her some formula I’d received while in the hospital. She drank it straight down. I was euphoric. This meant I didn’t really have to feed her. She seemed to love the formula. There was another, better way, which meant I could concentrate on our relationship instead of being a vending machine that was kicked continually by its one tyrannical customer.
My mother was at first thrilled to see my spirits lift and thought a combination of nursing and formula would help restore my tentative sanity. It soon became apparent that I was very reluctant to put my baby on the breast at all. I wanted an electric pump. I wanted that bottle there between me and the baby. I wanted to see what she got every time. The skin to skin situation was alien, alarming, draining. Even when my breasts were bulging and leaking, the only way I wanted to empty them was with a pump: an activity that I could do at my discretion and within my control.
What I envisioned to cope turned out to be complex and problematic. My daughter was screaming on and off, but mostly on, throughout the nights. I couldn’t tell whether she was taking formula as comfort or out of hunger. She seemed absolutely inconsolable. I was getting away from nursing, and anxious about everything I got or failed to get from the pump.
One friend realised what was happening and told me I wasn’t just using formula as a ‘supplement’ – that I wasn’t keeping nursing in the lead. She said that I had to put my baby back on the breast or I would lose my milk supply and it’s nearly impossible to get it back once it’s lost. It horrified me. I was certain I couldn’t succeed, but I felt that I couldn’t afford to fail either. I wanted to run away from the nursing relationship and yet I was also grieving it – I wanted to hang on to my supply.
I despised the nursing pillows around me. Every time I looked at them they said ‘failure’. Nursing was something other women could do. I couldn’t comprehend my baby’s unfathomable needs – or needing her in return. Then a strange thing happened.
My baby was five-and-a-half weeks old. I took her to her pediatric checkup. Outside in the waiting area was a woman with a toddler daughter. The woman saw me struggling with my distressed newborn and we discussed nursing. She explained that her daughter had been premature and that they’d had a lot of trouble with the feeding. In addition, the woman had to go back to work full time when her baby was tiny. It wasn’t easy, but they kept at it, nursing when they could, pumping breast milk when they couldn’t until the little girl was eleven months old. This struck me as an astonishing accomplishment.
I could see that this mother wasn’t especially privileged or well-educated. She was simply another devoted mother doing whatever she could for her baby. I saw her in a different light than I could have previously. I knew that for all my education, ‘articulate’ speech and my years of travel, she had both stayed put and yet travelled somewhere that I was afraid to go. And this woman was just one of many struggling parents I’d been surrounded by for years, without ever dreaming the half of what they were giving.
Inside the paediatrician’s office was a poster – the kind that either makes a woman feel proud that she is feeding or awful that she is not. It listed all the things that nursing helps prevent: a myriad of diseases. I looked at it in a state of intense guilt and exhaustion. I just wasn’t someone who could breastfeed; it was so unfair that no one understood. But then the last item on the poster’s long list surprised me: ‘loneliness’. Breastfeeding helps prevent loneliness. Loneliness was what I could comprehend. I was so alone. Maybe my baby was too?
I spoke with the paediatrician. He said any breast milk was better than none. He looked surprisingly meek and human for a doctor. His wife had gone through the challenges of nursing and he knew that the early days of establishing it could be very hard. He seemed to think I might recover my supply and arranged for me to speak with the lactation consultant after the checkup was over.
Nursing was, in my mind, the epitome of motherhood and that was part of why I was convinced I couldn’t do it. My life had been predicated for the most part on finding ways to be free and now I was suddenly trying to figure out how to be helplessly tethered. Succeeding at this was beyond me. My mother was with me, appearing calm for my sake. She had breastfed me around the clock for seven months because I’d been very tiny, yet had been dissuaded by her doctor from nursing my younger brother. That was the late ’60s when they knew so much less. It was one of my mother’s deepest regrets.
Now she waited with me for the lactation consultant, Maria. I’d met Maria once before and had spoken to her on the phone. She breezed in and I remembered what she’d said previously; that she had nursed three of her own children and bottle-fed one and that nursing was actually the easier choice once you got the hang of it.
Maria saw that I was wasted by exhaustion. She explained that I could get breastfeeding back but didn’t want me to beat myself up about the whole thing. She expressed her belief that if a baby was being adequately fed and fully loved, that that was hardly abuse. “But if it’s what you really want, put her on every hour and a half to two hours”, she said. “The milk supply will rebound. In the first six weeks, we have milk enough for two babies. It’s just a matter of getting it all moving again.”
I was afraid to believe her. I could hardly pump anything at all sometimes. “But the pump isn’t very effective”, she reminded me. “Put her on”, she said again, “If it’s what you really want.”
Therein began an incredibly frustrating week, with my mother coaxing me on every step of the way. The alternating discouragement and hope were like high seas. At first, my baby didn’t seem particularly interested in or contented with my milk. She would often be hungry again very shortly after I nursed and so I’d give her formula. This was the pattern, breast and then formula. Even in the middle of the night, I’d start heating the formula before putting her on the breast. Then one night she just fell right back asleep after being nursed. I couldn’t believe it. I ran around the house celebrating by myself, heating up plain old milk in the micro, so I could build up my own strength.
I’d been frantically writing all her feeds, the side she was on, the number of minutes, how much of it was breast, how many ounces was the formula. I kept pumping extra and freezing it whenever I could, convinced that my luck couldn’t last. I still didn’t trust my body. Yet to my astonishment, my daughter was seeming more and more content. Maybe it would have happened anyway, but it coincided with increased nursing. The formula seemed to make her gassier than my milk did. I was careful to steer away from the usual culprits that go into a mother’s milk and upset the baby. The best thing was that her diapers were no longer filled with copious dark goo that stank. Her poos were now minimal and light brown and usually smelled something like butter.
I don’t say any of the joys of bonding with a baby are lost on a mother who chooses the bottle as a primary means of feeding her baby. Just that it was magical to wake in the night and cherish lifting my baby, folding her into my arms, tucking her into the breast that had been conditioned to receive her and that she was practised in emptying. To give her what she needed so simply, right from my own body, was now not only painless, it was miraculous. It all seemed so simple at those moments, yet had come so hard. If it hadn’t been for all the help, most of all from my mother, I never would have got it back.
As I became a community volunteer who supported breastfeeding, I saw the spectrum of challenges that mothers go through. There’s one baby’s reflux, another’s determination to hang off the nipple, a mother’s mastitis, illness at birth, fiscal and cultural considerations and much more. But I’ll never forget a woman telling me once that she was taking a dietary supplement that had all the nutritional value of breast milk! I thought, first, you don’t need breast milk at your age. Second, there are well over 100 ingredients that have been identified in breast milk that formula companies could not replicate, and certainly, have not succeeded in making efficiently digestible. Even the iron in formula is a different animal digestion-wise than iron in breast milk.
There are surely cons as well as pros to breastfeeding, but we should not kid ourselves what they are. The initial pressures of nursing a baby can be petrifying, regardless of the degree to which you’ve ‘educated’ yourself beforehand. Some women just seem to spurt milk galore, while others have a supply that expresses more judiciously. Breasts and babies seem to have their individual style and we have to work with what we’ve got if we will carry on with the art of breastfeeding in real life. Yet we are on the whole better equipped to succeed at nursing than we believe. The time we nurse, and whether we nurse, is up to us in our unique physical and psychological circumstances. Perhaps breastfeeding isn’t for everyone but with a better understanding of how to support breastfeeding mothers in all their challenges, it could be the answer for a lot more of us.
Such a fantastic article about the trials and tribulations of feeding her demanding newborn and how Jennifer overcame breastfeeding through sheer hard work. Do you have a story related to breastfeeding, pumping and/or bottle feeding?
The truth about breastfeeding
It was so much easier than I was expecting. After attending a breastfeeding workshop before my son was born, I was prepared for a long hard battle but the truth was, 10 minutes after he was born I put him to my breast and he latched on. (Yes, I do realise how lucky we were!).
Once it’s established, it’s quite difficult to give up. I always said I’d stop at 6 months but my son is now 7 months and I’m still breastfeeding as it so much more convenient. I can’t find the motivation to go and make up a bottle when the alternative is to simply lift up my top. My stingy side also comes out when I’m in Sainsbury’s about to pick up a can of formula, ‘Six pounds!?!? But breastmilk is free!’ Someone please give me a nudge if you see me feeding through the school gates…
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To be honest, I expected breastfeeding to be simple and straight-forward and for me it was, apart from some pain because of poor positioning from about 3 to 6 weeks. I found it a lovely time of bonding with my babies and so easy to do.
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Apart from at the birth, I forgot to even try to breastfeed my baby in the hospital, until about nine hours after she was born and no midwife came and suggested it to me. Also, I had never heard of having to feed your newborn every hour, sometimes more frequently, which is what my daughter then required for the first couple of weeks. I heard it was going to be difficult and painful, which it was, but no-one talked specifically about what a sweaty wrestle each feed would be, trying to get comfortable with a mountain of cushions, how thirsty you will be, the flash of depression you get with the let-down reflex, and the soaked bed sheets and nightwear. I was also terrified of going out, not knowing when my daughter would want to feed, and not wanting to breastfeed in public. However, for me, these problems lasted only for the first three months, and then something clicked, and I completely and utterly loved it, and carried on until my daughter was fourteen months. I am now expecting another child, and will definitely be aiming to repeat this.
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While I appreciated the fact that there were midwives on hand in the hospital to help us out with breastfeeding, I didn’t realise that it would be a literally ‘hands-on’ experience! We were in hospital for five days (following a C-section) and we had difficulty establishing breastfeeding so, by the time we left, it felt like every midwife in North Hertfordshire had manhandled my breasts.
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I wanted to try breastfeeding my baby, having received great encouragement at one of the breastfeeding workshops. When I was told I’d have to have a Caesarean delivery at 38 weeks because the baby was in breech position, I was really concerned that I wouldn’t be able to because my body wouldn’t be “ready” to produce the necessary colostrum and milk.8
However, I needn’t have worried – after a quick and straight-forward operation, we were taken to the recovery room, I had some tea and toast, and then the midwife showed me how to hold the baby for feeding and helped her to latch on. It was amazing – my daughter seemed to know exactly what to do. I just sat there and let her carry on!! I couldn’t believe how strong her sucking was too!! She sucked away contentedly for about half an hour, she must have been really hungry.
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The first time I left my breastfed baby for an evening, I wasn’t prepared for how full my breasts would become and how uncomfortable. I ended up in the ladies’ toilet of a posh London restaurant, hand-expressing milk into the loo, just to get some relief!
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When I was pregnant both times, I had no milk leakage at all and I was worried that this meant I wasn’t producing milk. However, each time I fed successfully with no problems – the first time around for 2 years, and this time around for 4 months and counting….. I found feeding difficult and painful at first with both girls, though the pain didn’t last as long with my second, only a couple of weeks. It quickly became second nature and so easy, so I was very glad I persevered each time. Also, never rely on sleeping on a towel as a way of soaking up excess milk when you’re in bed – this is all very well until you lie on your back in your sleep and your boobs end up saturating your duvet instead!
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I had no problems with either of the girls, except some minor discomfort at the beginning with my first daughter. I wasn’t sure what to expect but both babies got the hang of latching on straight away, and to be honest, nothing could have been easier. The biggest surprise was how different Lola was to Lily – her feeds were always over within 10 minutes whereas Lily would stay as long as you let her. I worried at first that she couldn’t possibly be getting enough hindmilk, but her growth proved she was.
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At antenatal classes and after the birth the focus is on the mother producing enough milk for her baby. No one warned me you could make too much! It was squirting out everywhere! There’s nothing like waking up with rock-solid breasts! It felt like someone had given me a concrete implant overnight!
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We went through a phase when baby was perhaps 3 months old of suddenly experiencing quite bad pain on let-down, it lasted maybe 30 seconds at the beginning of every feed and was very uncomfortable, fortunately after a couple of weeks it stopped. When baby was 4-5 months old, he would sleep through the night from 8.00 or 9.00pm, which was lovely, but I’d often wake up with very engorged leaky breasts any time between 3.00am and 7.00am which somewhat diminished the ‘baby sleeping through the night’ joy. Expressing milk is not fun especially at 4am and I sometimes resorted to waking him up to feed, which fortunately he never minded. This excess-milk-at-night problem has improved a lot with weaning.
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I was amazed at just how big my boobs would get!!!!
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I had problems with a poor milk supply and had to use an electric breast pump for several weeks to build up my supply. That is a weird experience! Not physically uncomfortable but I now have a certain empathy with cows in milking parlours!
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I breastfed my two children for quite a long time, ten months for the first (and we only stopped then because I was pregnant again and my milk dried up) and fifteen months for the second. I was surprised at the way people’s attitudes changed. Up to six months, everyone was very encouraging and made me feel like I was doing a great thing for my babies but the longer I breastfed, the more frequently I’d hear comments about giving up. Certainly after one year, there was definite disapproval from some quarters. My advice? Ignore everyone and breastfeed for as long as you and your baby want it.
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I was VERY shocked the first time I used a breast pump & discovered that milk doesn’t just come from one hole!!!
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I’ve had two children by C-sections and struggled each time with breastfeeding. I wanted both my children to be breastfed, but both have been mostly bottle fed.
My first born was nasal gastric tube fed in an incubator for the first 7 weeks, therefore, I couldn’t breastfeed and had to express. Those pictures you see in the adverts of women wearing expressing bras and attachments, expressing whilst playing with their baby, holding a conversation on the ‘phone and grinning like they’re in a Colgate advert are lying. In reality, I found it to be nothing remotely like this. I was plugged into the hospital machine, in a windowless room the size of a broom cupboard and smelling of drains, desperately trying to get more than a few drops. I’d be really pleased walking out with an inch worth in a bottle only to be disappointed by a nurse taking it from me with a face as if to say ‘is that it?’ The solution given to me by the hospital breastfeeding counsellor was to express at 5 am in the morning. 5 am!! Were they mad? I tried this a few times, but it tired me out as I was spending 8 am – 11 pm at the hospital, so needed all the sleep I could get. I expressed for 10 weeks before I conceded defeat.
With my son, I breastfed straight away, and although found it far more difficult than I’d read, I was determined to keep going. Two weeks after birth, I got an infection in my section wound that would re-occur for the next four weeks. I was put on strong antibiotics which I was told would be present in my breast milk [albeit safe for the baby]. However, the infection pain and the effect of the medicine forced me to give up.
The Health Visitor in each case was lovely and said that I should congratulate myself on getting that far, whereas my Mum said that it ‘was a shame that I’d given up’ – I was devastated by that comment. I’ve learnt a big lesson on what to say and what not to say to a woman who has tried but couldn’t continue.
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I was shocked at the start that every time I dried myself after a shower – I poured with milk!
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From speaking with my friends, I have found there to be many women who agree breastfeeding is best, but have for one reason or another not been able to. If you are unable to breastfeed, the social stigma can be crushing. I felt embarrassed for not being able to breastfeed and guilty at letting my children down. I felt I got little support and, in my opinion, those who feel strongly about breastfeeding are always critical of those who aren’t, regardless of the situation.
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What surprised me was how much easier it was the second time around. I knew how to attach my baby and didn’t suffer at all with painful nipples as I had with the first – practice makes perfect!
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I was surprised at how much more quickly my new daughter feeds compared to how my older daughter fed when she was a baby – 10-15mins and she’s done – with great weight gain!!
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I couldn’t believe how much my let down reflex hurt or how well my very small boobs fed my 8lb 12oz baby.
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I was also shocked at how much I had to re-learn as I thought it would all come naturally second time around. Instead, I had to call in the NCT breastfeeding counsellor on several occasions to get things established,
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The first time around I suffered from intense pain as a result of the engorgement, so I decided to pump out the excess (which, as I now know, was completely the wrong thing to do, as it just prolonged the cycle!). This time around I only suffered from a mildly painful 2 days of engorgement, as I resisted the urge to use a pump.
I’m also far more relaxed about feeding in public now. With my first daughter, I would make a great palaver of buying those special breastfeeding tops (which look awful), and did my best to disguise my boob when feeding her. This time around, I’m not bothering with those feeding tops (so I’m able to wear nice tops again!), and use a scarf or muslin to disguise my boob. Being calmer about the whole thing has really paid off, and I’m not so panicky about it anymore!
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I was quite shocked at how the midwives just got hold of my nipples and thrust them into Thomas’ mouth! But then after childbirth – I’d lost all dignity anyway!
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I was surprised at how easy it was to breastfeed in public. I was unsure how I would feel about it and after the first few weeks (when I was usually out with other breastfeeding mothers too), I was confident enough to do it anywhere! People would even come up to me and stroke my son, not realising I was feeding! A friend of my husband took a photo of me feeding my son on a park bench and was mortified when a few minutes later he discovered that I’d been feeding him!
I was also surprised that once I had perfected the technique, I could do it in the dark and Thomas just ‘knew’ what to do!
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I wasn’t prepared for how much I would enjoy it and how hard it was to eventually give up.
Do you have any breastfeeding/bottle-feeding home truths you’d like to share?
Breastfeeding basics: advice for new mums
Reference: Trotter S (2008). Breastfeeding basics: advice for new mums. Nursing in Practice (September/October 2008) Number 44 – (Children’s health): 23-5.
By Sharon Trotter ¦ Midwife and Mother & Baby Consultant ¦ TIPS Ltd
Despite numerous initiatives to support breastfeeding mothers, breastfeeding rates continue to drop dramatically within weeks of delivery. This appears to be due to lack of confidence and not, as often mentioned breastfeeding technique.
Recent figures published by the Department of Health show that although the initiation of breastfeeding has risen by 7 percent to 77 percent in the past five years, the drop-off rates in the first few weeks of life are alarmingly steep with only 1 percent of mothers still exclusively breastfeeding their infant by six months of age (NHS 2005).
Exclusive breastfeeding during the first six months of life provides for all the nutritional needs of a baby. Half of these needs can still be met by breastfeeding in the period from six to 12 months. From 12 to 24 months a baby will still receive a third of its nutritional requirements from breast milk alone (WHO 2006).
Early drop off in breastfeeding may be influenced by a number of factors. A generation of bottle feeding mothers is partly responsible for eroding the primary skills needed to support and empower women during breastfeeding. Such skills need to be relearned so that women can once again tune into their own instincts and their baby’s needs. New mothers no longer have the luxury of long hospital stays or the support of an extended family to help them establish successful breastfeeding (NPEU 2006).
Breastfeeding technique plays its part; however, confusing diagrams or hands on manipulation can be deconstructive. Successful breastfeeding has more to do with building and sustaining confidence. Cultural issues (such as the association of breasts with sex in western society) also play a part and it will take time for attitudes to change. Such are the issues that the Scottish Government had to pass legislation guaranteeing women’s rights to breastfeed in public (English legislation is set to follow suit shortly) [OPSI 2005].
This is helpful, but we still have a long way to go before breastfeeding is accepted as the infant feeding norm. According to a new telephone poll conducted by Kamillosan one in four top British restaurants ban breastfeeding (Kamillosan 2008a).
Kamillosan also surveyed 3,500 mums across the nation and the survey reveals new mums are terrified at the thought of breastfeeding in public. Thirty-eight percent of mothers prefer to breastfeed in public lavatories than face disapproving glares from strangers. A fifth of mums are so worried about other people’s opinions they opted to leave the baby screaming for milk rather than breastfeed (Kamillosan 2008b).
In fact, the natural bonding experience is ruined for many by negative reactions, inappropriate comments and blatant stares. A staggering 54 percent of breastfeeding mothers say they have been subjected to unwanted attention.
The question remains as to why, with all evidence pointing to a need for consistent advice and ongoing support for breastfeeding, especially in the early days after delivery, mothers are still left wanting? (Dhandapany et al 2008)
Inconsistent advice – is this the biggest barrier to success?
In an online poll, 125 mothers reported their top three breastfeeding problems (Trotter 2008).Eighty percent of those problems were directly associated with conflicting advice. This led to physical difficulties (such as sore nipples, blocked duct, mastitis, thrush and tongue-tie) as well as psychological problems (mainly lack of confidence caused by conflicting advice). When it comes to breastfeeding advice, midwives are the key source of information for new mothers.
A National Childbirth Trust (NCT) survey found that 77 percent of women receive breastfeeding information from midwives during their pregnancy, while 20 percent get information from health visitors and 7 percent from GPs (NCT 2006). Yet, nearly half of the women surveyed said they did not receive as much support as they needed regarding breastfeeding. As a result of this, more than 50 percent of women stopped breastfeeding sooner than they would have liked.
Women who took part in the Healthcare Commission 2007 survey of NHS maternity services were asked about the advice and support they had received from midwives and other healthcare professionals in relation to feeding their baby (breast or bottle) [Healthcare Commission 2007].Almost two thirds of women surveyed felt that they did not receive consistent advice, practical help or active support and encouragement.
NICE guidance for routine postnatal care of women and their babies recommends that all maternity care providers (whether in a hospital or primary care setting) should implement an externally-evaluated structured programme that encourages breastfeeding using the Baby Friendly Initiative as a minimum standard (see Resources)[NICE 2006].
Currently, only 10 percent of women give birth in a fully accredited Baby Friendly hospital. Although breastfeeding rates are considerably higher in such units, there remains a reluctance to implement this standard. This is despite the fact that hospitals with low breastfeeding rates can see these double when they become Baby Friendly. Even hospitals with relatively high breastfeeding rates can see this increase by at least 10 percent with associated savings due to reduced instances of childhood illnesses such as gastroenteritis, asthma and middle-ear infection. A national breastfeeding helpline was launched in February 2008 with a yearly funding of £150,000 (DoH 2008). This service is staffed by trained volunteers from the Breastfeeding Network and the Association of Breastfeeding Mothers who answer calls from their own home. The lines are open from 9.30am to 9.30pm. This falls far short of the 24-hour service breastfeeding mother’s need, as problems are unlikely to be confined to daylight hours. The fact that this service is run by volunteers places undue pressure on women who are likely to be busy with young families of their own. Until provision is made for a fully funded helpline (manned by lactation consultants – possibly as part of the NHS 24-hour advice service) women are unlikely to receive the support they deserve when they need it.
Building confidence is the key to success
As a breastfeeding consultant and author of Breastfeeding – the essential guide, I am all too aware of the common concerns (not necessarily problems) associated with the early days of breastfeeding (Trotter 2004).As already explained, these may include a variety of conditions that must be diagnosed promptly by someone who really understands how breastfeeding works and is able to help correct any aspect of the breastfeeding technique. Central to this process is confidence building. Being a new parent is stressful. Evidence shows that mothers who receive support from someone who believes they can breastfeed will breastfeed for longer (BBC News 2008). Such level of supportive advice from someone mothers trust, together with support from peers (family, friends or breastfeeding support group) is of most help.
Conclusion
It is ironic that the introduction of artificial baby milks in the 1950s, as a way of enticing women into health clinics, has led the trend towards bottle feeding as we know it today (Palmer 1993). The multimillion-pound promotion of these baby milks uses ever more sophisticated marketing techniques to lull parents into thinking that these products are the next-best-thing to breast milk. In reality this could not be further from the truth and the ill effects of widespread formula feeding on infant health and indeed on public health are huge. These include increased financial pressures due to ill-health on our already overstretched health service. This situation will not change overnight, but the more aware we become of the short- and long-term benefits of breastfeeding for mother and baby, the more we will understand the need for effective breastfeeding support to be a top priority rather than an afterthought (NPEU 2006). To achieve this, we must ensure that health professionals are adequately trained. However, it is also essential for support to be targeted more effectively in the early weeks of breastfeeding and for a national helpline manned by lactation consultants to be established.
There are very few difficulties that cannot be resolved and even fewer reasons why women cannot establish successful breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding toolkit:
Health professionals should have access to a Breastfeeding Toolkit in order to provide for the needs of new mums. An example of one such tool is described in an article by Nikki Lee, a lactation consultant. She introduced me to the delights of co-bathing as a tool to assist in the recovery of breastfeeding (Lee 2005).When mum and baby experience skin-to-skin contact in a warm bath, the mother’s levels of circulating oxytocin are raised. Her nipples then become more erect and it is easier for the baby to attach to the breast.
The following advice forms part of my own Breastfeeding Toolkit for new mums. I hope you will find this helpful when supporting new mothers in your care. This is what you may like to suggest:
Surround yourself with positive support and always include your partner
Get help with positioning and attachment from the start – this does not mean “hands on” manipulation of mother and baby but one-to-one explanation and reassurance
Be inventive – there are 360° of attachment so finding the perfect position for you and your baby may take a while and a certain amount of trial and error. You will know when you have achieved this because feeding will be comfortable
Breastfeeding should not hurt – if you are in pain get help from someone who really understands breastfeeding. To have a friend or a breastfeeding counsellor who is experienced in breastfeeding would be a great help at this time. Contact your local breastfeeding association (National Childbirth Trust, Association of Breastfeeding Mothers, Breast Feeding Network or La Leche League) for details of your nearest support group
If your nipples do become sore:
Correct your positioning and attachment to prevent any further damage.
Use a soothing ointment (chamomile, lanolin or similar natural plant-based formulations all work well) to protect them while they heal. Moist healing works twice as quickly than if left dry (Palfreyman et al 2006 & Huml 1999)
Biological nurturing – this is a mother-centred approach. It suggests new ways to hold and cuddle babies and aims to increase the enjoyment of breastfeeding. This can greatly help with positioning and attachment (see Resources)
Listen to a baby’s cues – breastfeeding can only work when it is baby led
Stimulate your breasts – just the smell, sight and touch of your baby will help to do this. This includes co-bathing (see above)
Unrestricted breastfeeding should be encouraged, especially overnight, as this helps to promote and maintain a steady milk supply
It takes around six to eight weeks for the delicate balance of milk supply and demand to be established, so do not be tempted to introduce bottles or formula feeds
During this time I do not recommend expressing as this will not stimulate milk production as well as direct feeding. Expressing also defeats the object when breastfeeding is so convenient
Try not to be separated from your baby – close contact (not necessarily skin-to-skin) greatly helps to stimulate milk-producing hormones
Close contact with dads should also be encouraged. This will help promote a closer bond as you all settle into your new family unit, no matter how big or small
Growth charts used in the UK are based on bottlefed babies so weight gain for your breastfed baby may appear to be slow. These growth charts will be replaced with World Health Organization (WHO) breastfeeding growth charts soon
As long as your baby is waking up for feeds, taking feeds well and having wet and dirty nappies, you can be reassured that they are getting enough milk
It is not unusual for a baby to feed between 12 and 20 times a day in the early weeks. But this will settle down – promise!
Breastfeeding will help you to lose the extra weight your body gained during pregnancy
Breastfeeding is much more than just a way of feeding your baby milk. It provides the emotional and psychological stability your baby needs to become self-confident, relaxed, independent and secure
Above all enjoy breastfeeding – with each feed you will get a rush of endorphins, which are basically “happy hormones”. This makes you and your baby feel good and is nature’s own stress-buster
Department of Health (2008). National breastfeeding helpline launched. Available from: http://nds.coi.gov.uk/Content/Detail.asp?ReleaseID=352806&NewsAreaID=2
Dhandapany G, Bethou A, Arunagirinathan A, et al. Antenatal counselling on breastfeeding – is it adequate? A descriptive study from Pondicherry, India. Int Breastfeed J 2008;4:5.
Healthcare Commission. Women’s experiences of maternity care in the NHS in England. Key findings from a survey of NHS trusts carried out in 2007. Available from: http://www.healthcarecommission.org.uk/_db/_documents/Maternity_services_survey_report.pdf
Huml S (1999). Sore Nipples: A new look at an old problem through the eyes of a dermatologist. Practising Midwife.2 (2).
Kamillosan (2008a). Telephone poll of 100 restaurants to gauge reaction of breastfeeding in public. Available on request from info@kamillosan.co.uk .
Kamillosan (2008b). Online survey of 3500 mothers regarding views breastfeeding on breastfeeding in public. Available on request from info@kamillosan.co.uk
Lee N. Breastfeeding recovery: more tools for the helpers. MidirsMidwifery Digest 2005;15:229-33.
National Childbirth Trust (2006). Midwives top chart for breastfeeding information. Available from: http://www.nct.org.uk/press-office/press-releases/view/13
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Breastfeeding twins
Before I had my babies, I hadn’t met anyone who had successfully breastfed twins and despite what the books may said, I assumed it was something that was nigh on impossible.
During my pregnancy, I often felt a slight sense of sadness that I would not get to enjoy the wonderful intimacy with my babies that comes from breastfeeding. Don’t get me wrong, I’m no BF evangelist, I didn’t manage to feed my first child and struggled with my second. BUT when I did crack it, I loved it and carried on for a year.
But back to the twins, and apart from the usual panics and freak-outs that happen when you discover that the number of children in the household is about to double and you need to prepare for twins, I decided I would make no plans for feeding other than to see what happened when they were born.
Of course, with a twin pregnancy, there are so many other risks like pre-term labour and its associated complications, I felt it would be best to wait and see. I knew that if they were early and needed special care, it might be too much for me to feed them, given the 2 children that I would have at home who would also need me.
Charlie and Beatrix arrived 3 weeks early, after a straight-forward planned C-section. Charlie needed a brief spell in SCBU, and neither showed much interest in feeding. By day 2, the staff were keen to give Beatrix some formula, as she had not fed. My milk hadn’t come in yet and they were concerned by her low blood sugar levels. I insisted she was given this from a cup and she lapped at it like a kitten.
On day 3, my hormones kicked in (but not yet my milk) and I felt quite upset. All attempts to get the babies to latch on were failing and the more man-handling that happened, the sorer my nipples were getting.
A breastfeeding counsellor happened upon me at a vulnerable moment and advised me to use a pump every 2-3 hours, even though Charlie was on a drip in special care so that my body would know I was feeding 2 babies. The prospect of this was exhausting, and I felt sure that when my milk came in, my babies would know what to do and that my supply would regulate itself then. I was too desperate for sleep to consider pumping through that night.
A paediatrician told me off for limiting the time that the babies fed, saying they should be allowed to feed for as long as they want to but with the benefit of hindsight, I knew to ignore this and thus avoid the agonising blistering and bleeding that happened first time around when my darling daughter simply wanted to comfort suck for hours at a time.
We could come home on day 5 and with mum and husband around I could continue feeding the babies myself. In the comfort of my home I attempted to feed them at the same time (using the rugby ball hold) but I found it a) completely indecent and impractical for when out of the house and b) a bit like listening to someone running their nails down a blackboard as they sucked differently and the sensation of them feeding together was altogether unpleasant.
As I recovered from my C-section, my husband did all the getting up and down out of bed in the night to pass me the babies and change nappies. Those first few weeks passed in a complete blur of exhaustion–the babies were so little they needed to feed every 2 hours, each feed with winding and sometimes changing. Both took the best part of an hour and I averaged 3 hours of sleep a night. However, with ongoing help at home during the daytime, I could get a nap each afternoon, which kept me going.
At first, I kept a breast for each baby as Beatrix was better at latching on one side than the other but then she failed to gain weight and my health visitor advised me to swap the side each baby fed from at each feed. That week she gained 9oz, so we concluded I was obviously making full fat on one side and only semi-skimmed on the other!
The response of others to my feeding both babies was one of incredulity, and yes, it has been hard at times but in all honesty, it’s been far easier than you would imagine. For one thing, I can up and leave the house with the children with far less thought than if I had to consider how many bottles I would need. Secondly, feeding myself means that I have been forced to take that time to sit still and put my feet up at regular intervals during the day, which I probably wouldn’t have done had others been able to feed them for me. Most importantly, I have been able to have that special intimate time with each baby individually.
12 weeks on and I’m still breastfeeding my twins. It’s true that I wouldn’t have been able to do it without having plenty of help with the other two children (ages 4 and 2) but I’m hugely proud of myself and would encourage anyone else expecting twins not to rule out breastfeeding.
