Agatha’s Birth Story
Knowing that only 5% of babies ever arrive on their due date and that my mum had been 2 weeks late and induced with both my sister and myself I prepared myself for being overdue. I didn’t mind, I quite enjoyed being pregnant and I like spending days getting to know my new friends from antenatal classes and the NCT over coffee and cake.
The Friday night before my due date I spent at my husband’s Christmas do dancing the night away and the Saturday just dosing on the sofa. (Frantic floor cleaning didn’t happen) We were trying to decide what to do on Sunday as it was potentially our last day as a couple. We planned on having a lazy day, having breakfast in bed, watching a film and going out for dinner later on. I didn’t even give the fact that it was my due date a second thought. I hadn’t bothered packing a bag for the hospital, partly because I was planning a home birth and partly because I just didn’t want to do it!
I woke at 4.30am on Sunday morning with a bit of a tummy ache but put it down to Braxton Hicks after overdoing it on Friday. The baby was the only 3/5th engaged at my last checkup so there was no danger of her arriving yet. I’d had no show and my waters hadn’t broken so probably just a false alarm. I managed to go back to bed but at 7.30am I just became uncomfortable. I left my husband sleeping in bed and crept downstairs to watch a film. Something made me put the times of the pains in my mobile phone and by 8.30am they’d been coming every 10 – 15 minutes. It still didn’t occur to me that I was in labour. At 8.30am I started to throw up. It was only then that I thought I might be in labour. My mum, my aunty and my sister were all sick in labour and that thought suddenly popped into my mind. I remember my mum saying “You’re either sick or swear like a navvy” I hoped it was true I didn’t fancy swearing at my husband or the midwife! My husband heard me being sick and thought it was probably time to get up! The next hour went very quickly. We tried to watch a program but only managed to get 11 minutes in and we’d re-wound it several times due to me moaning through the contractions. I tried to have a bath, pack a bag and move the table in the dining room ready for the birthing pool, and straighten my hair! (Why I thought I needed to do my hair I’ll never know!) In between all this, I was having contractions and being sick. Needless to say, I wasn’t very successful at any of these tasks. By 9.30am we phoned the hospital and said that we thought I was in Labour and they told us to phone back a bit later. The contractions were coming thick and fast. 3-4 every 10 minutes followed by me being sick. Within 20 minutes we’d phoned the hospital a second time and asked them to send the midwives.
The first midwife arrived around 10.30am and the second midwife arrived with a student midwife just before 11 am. (The journalist and photographer also arrived at this time but that’s another story!)The next 4 hrs seemed to pass in a bit of a blur. I had a tens machine which worked really well for me, and would thoroughly recommend. The midwives examined me and I was 5 cm dilated. (So my husband tells me!) I had a birthing pool and a birthing ball but because of the position of the baby, I didn’t find either of these comfortable. I wasn’t expecting labour to hurt as much as it did. My sister is a real wimp, she can’t even bear to have her legs waxed and she gave birth on just gas and air so I figured it would be easy. How wrong I was. I don’t think anyone can prepare you for the pain. I think the contractions wouldn’t have been quite so bad if I wasn’t so sick. As soon as a contraction finished I threw up and by the time I’d stopped throwing up the next contraction had started. The gas and air were great. It made me feel almost drunk and a bit hazy. I don’t remember thinking it was helping relieve the pain but it was a great distraction. Just biting on the tube was good. I also remember squeezing the midwives hand very hard, I did think I don’t know how they wear rings it must really hurt when labouring women are squeezing their hands. I wasn’t very aware of my husband. He seemed to be busy emptying and filling buckets for the birthing pool. He was great at mind reading. I couldn’t speak and just managed to shout single words like “water”, “lips” and “hand” and he was very good at knowing exactly what I wanted when I couldn’t speak.
I remember at one point thinking I needed pain relief and the midwife saying “you’re doing really well my lovely just a little bit longer” I really needed her encouragement. About 2 pm I got out of the birthing pool as I was just so uncomfortable. I remember feeling the sting and I could hear my brother in law saying “it might sting a little!” it was the clue I had to start pushing. I could also hear my antenatal teacher saying “little pushes stretch things to prevent you from tearing.” After about 40 minutes I thought sod this I don’t care if I tear I just want her out! I also remember hearing the midwife saying “push through your bottom or you’ll get a sore throat” I’d heard that said on television programmes before and always wondered what it meant but at that precise time I seemed to know exactly what to do. It was amazing. An hour later at 3.15pm weighing 6lb 9.5oz on Sunday 5th December 2010 (her due date – check me out I’m now in that 5% statistic!) Agatha Florence Fenella King was born at home. My husband cut the cord and I held my daughter on the sofa. It was hard to believe this little girl had only minutes before been inside me.
I had opted for a natural third stage and was happy to sit on the sofa waiting for this to happen. I’m quite an organised person and in my head I had:
- Have baby
- Deliver Placenta
- Have shower
- Sit in bed feeding baby eating toast and drinking champagne.
This was as much of a birth plan as I’d made as I didn’t want to be worrying that things weren’t going to plan as I figured I’d just need to do what was best for baby and me at the time. It seemed though even this was too big a plan. After an hour I was unable to deliver the placenta so they gave me the injection. This still had no effect so an ambulance was called and I had to be taken to the hospital. I wasn’t very aware of Agatha at this point. I fed her as soon as she was born but the journalist held her to have her vitamin k injection and my husband held her and bonded with his daughter whilst I was trying to deliver the placenta. I just couldn’t focus on anything else until that had happened. Blood pouring out of me, hair plastered to my face and sat naked in my dining room surrounded by 5 strangers I had a little chuckle to myself, 5 hours ago I was planning on straightening my hair and wearing a tankini how naive was I?
As the ambulance arrived to take me to hospital Agatha stopped breathing and went blue and a second ambulance was called for her. She was given oxygen and on arrival at hospital Agatha was put under a heat lamp and monitored, whilst I was taken into theatre, catheterised and given a spinal block before having the placenta removed. We ended up having to spend a night in the hospital before being allowed to go home the following day. (Note to self-pack bag next time even if planning a home birth. My husband’s packing was not great but he had drinks and Kit Kats to keep him going – I, on the other hand, was destined to go home naked!)
Despite my home birth not exactly going to plan it was still definitely the right choice for me. I liked being in my own home, and having my belongings around me helped me to relax. I had 2 midwives there to support me throughout the labour. They were not running in and out and busy with lots of other women and trying to remember several different birth plans and requirements. They were able to encourage me and support me when I was struggling and knew the right things to say as they had spent some time getting to know me, rather than me being just a number in a hospital. If I had been in hospital I think I would have probably been given pain relief which I didn’t really want but I think it would have been too easy to accept in when in pain. I did not enjoy my stay in hospital – I’m not saying the hospital was bad but it wasn’t for me. I got conflicting advice on several things and felt unsupported and ignored. I have already decided that providing there are no complications with my next pregnancy I will opt for a home birth again, I know that not having a show, waters breaking and baby not being engaged mean nothing and that baby might actually arrive on her due date. And I’ll keep the Moet on ice just in case!
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